Live Without Fear

I often forget about the clear blue skies and colorful sunsets while I'm running circles around a ticking clock. Time hasn't quite let me out of its clutches just yet and I haven't got the strength to fight against it yet. While trying to figure out where I am in school, work, and family I often forget about just stopping so I can enjoy it all. So I can just live again.

I know that I am not the only who struggles with time weighing them down but its always so hard to just break free. I always see life kinda like that awesome movie where the main character is just so overwhelmed and sick of life that they can just shed their skin and travel to find who they really are in this world and are happier for doing it in the first place. I think thats why I am always so sucked into story lines and happy endings. The story is always so interesting that you just can't hit the pause button so you follow the person all the way until the end and find that instead of working in their hometown of like 50 people that they're finally in the big city trying to make their dreams work and THEY ARE HAPPY.

Thats what I always envied about the characters in a movie or TV show, they could always just leave without being weighed down by having to pay bills and things they could just get up and do it. In real life we have to make sure bills are paid, jobs are set, say goodbye to everyone, forward mail, pack, save money, etc. They don't have too, because they are a fictional character they usually have no problems with just packing a bag and leaving on a bus. 

I know that at the end of the day I'm being just a bit silly about all of this but wouldn't it be amazing to just pack up and go wherever we wanted and not have to worry about not being able to make it out okay? If I could I would just travel the world taking amazing pictures, finding amazing hidden places tucked far away, listening to great stories, and learning things I normally wouldn't living in just one place. I just want to be able to live without fearing for my next paycheck or making sure bills are paid on time, I mean yes that is the responsible adult thing to do but what about experiencing the world like it should be? 

I would rather live without fear than to fear living. 

Nostalgia

Its easy to say that simplicity is best sometimes. Within simplicity there is only black and white, wrong and right, there are no gray areas to be concerned about. Simplicity is at its best when we're young. There is no reasoning to be explained, no hard questions to answer. Often I find myself yearning to be younger so that I don't have to have a job, be responsible and pay bills, go to college (although I do like college, I passed with 3 A's, 2 B's and a 2.73 GPA), and generally do appropriate adult things. Yes I do have more freedom than I did as a child and I am making my own money to buy the things that I want and need, but where is the childish freedom? When becoming an adult you have to grow and and realize that there is a fine line between being a kid like teenager and a young whipper snapper who is giving back in the adult world.

I sometimes miss those mid-day nap times and coloring outside the lines. Although I am learning more and more things its still sometimes hard to grow up from watching old cartoons like Sailor Moon and Woody the Woodpecker. I still remember watching The Mighty Morphin Power Rangers everyday after school. There are times when I wish that I could go back to these days to remember what its like to be a kid again. Then I remember that although I am now a young adult that I can still be a little kid sometimes, I can still get excited about cartoons and cereal on Saturday mornings and sleeping in on Sundays.

Even though I have to go to college so I can reach my dream job I can still have my summer vacation. Point one for me! I can still have my lazy summer days, when I don't work that is. Late nights and Livin' the Life...in the Sims that is. I can say that my trip down nostalgic memory lane is over now.

Life Lesson: You can grow up AND still be a kid!

A week in NY taught me to grow

So New York last month was amazing. I had such a fantastic time in the city that I almost didn't come back home. At times I wish I had stayed, however, I know that in the end I'll rise up stronger and wiser than I did before.

I learned a lot of professional things while I was in New York at the 70th annual National Broadcasting Society Convention.

1. Social media is really relative to how well you can do in business and how you showcase yourself and your talents and if you wouldn't want your employer to see it then don't post it.

2. You should also let your work speak for you when you can't be there to speak for yourself.

3. Have a resume and a business card, and if at all possible a cd/dvd of the things you've done.

4. Get creative.

5. When applying for internships remember that even if its not in the department you want, if you put a lot of effort into it like staying late and always saying yes (within reason of course) as well as having a positive attitude your more likely to get offered a position as well as having positive recognition at other businesses.

5. Have a blog, website, or youtube account with web produced shows.

These are just some of the things that I learned while at the NBS convention last month. I can't wait for next years convention. I'll be posting the pictures of my trip sometime tomorrow so watch for those!

If anyone has any questions/comments leave 'em below! I'd be happy to answer them all! :) I'm currently working on a weekly youtube idea as well as designing a new web layout for this blog!

Happy Wednesday!

NY here I come!

Pretty excited that in just thirty four and a half hours I will be on my first flight ever! Let alone to a magical place called New York City! I have always wanted to go on this magical journey to the "Big Apple." New York seems to be the place where you find this deep root of appreciation for americanism because of the place it represents. It may not be the official place of the port to America, but t will always be that way to me. I can't wait to travel the city to its very well known historic places of interests, get lost on the subway (never been underground before either), and find these gems of hidden places that no one really knows about.I think thats what interests me the most about NY, is that even though everyone knows these famous places in NY there are still places that no one knows about. I am so excited to take my camera with me to document the whole experience.

(picture taken from: this website)

I just can't tell you how amazing it is for me to be able to go to a place like this. I have never traveled to the east coast let alone up north without my family. I will be alone except for the people going with me for a convention we're attending. I can't wait to fly up to NY and have an amazing experience there.

Oh New York! Meet me on Broadway!

Love Muah

Dreamy Valentine.

Everyone at one point has disliked this holiday because of being the 'single one'. I myself have been the single one of my friends for a long time. It's not that I'm eternally bitter or very picky. I just never seem to click with that 'special guy'. I know one day I'll find him out there. Maybe not this valentines day, but perhaps in the future. I do prefer to think of him as a knight in shiny armor. He doesn't have to be on a horse, or have a shiny blond hair. Personally I wouldn't mind a tattoo or two, ripped jeans and a band tee kinda guy. Valentines next year is sure to rock! Velvet cupcakes and a concert fur sure.

Whirlwind

So for the last three days I've been a mess. My mom is in the hospital and in ICU and wont be home for a few more days. I felt like all the oxygen was pulled from my body and someone smashed my brains in. I think mostly because I haven't been able to fully step back from the situation and breathe. But as night falls thats exactly what I am doing. I'm going to take that warm bubble bath, cry, and get some good sleep for the first time in days. My mom is coming home soon and I can't be a mess for her or myself. I know life is hard sometimes and this is one of those times but I can't keep falling apart at the seams.

On another note my ipad I so excitedly ordered last Thursday has finally made its way incredibly closer. I never knew how far things traveled when you order them online. I've become obsessed with tracking my order (I'm new to this whole online ordering thing). It's quite fun for me. Its a small relaxing moment in my day. That'll be fun to play with.

I have also fallen in love with a song called "Part of Me" by a wonderful and inspiring artist called Katy Perry. Please enjoy the awesomeness. (embedded from KatyPerryVEVO)

Like A Ghost

The darkness whispers for me

Calling out my name

I can feel their cold stares

Chilling to the bones

I can no longer feel the sun on my skin

The beat of my heart seems to be muted

A voice that will not carry to any ears

This must be what I have always feared

A spectral being ignored by those who can see

A ghost long forgotten

Tossed between the limbo

Memories lost in a haze

Unknowingly wondering the edges of time

A ghost she is now

A ghost she ever was

A ghosts she always be

Like a ghost stuck inside the mirror of forever